Words matter

Words matter.
Attitude matters.
Choosing what we say, and how we say it, is critically important to communicating.
One section of a book I once read made me aware of how some people, men most commonly, use aggressive language which can make other people, often women, shut down.
This is not usually intentional, on either side of that channel, but it is no less real just because it is not consciously chosen.
I realized that this is one way in which some women are made to feel unwelcome in the workplace.

This awareness was powerful for me.
I am not generally an aggressive person, I am pretty even keeled.
As I started listening to myself talk, and re-reading my written word.
I saw aggression and violent language which I had never intended.
“You killed it!”
“We have to beat them”
Aggression has a time and a place.
It does not belong in the office or in a relationship.

Once I was aware, I was able to make a change in how I communicated.
There was an interesting side effect.
I became more conscious of how I felt toward other people.
I became more gentle.
I became more caring.
My mindset shifted.
More people engaged and listened.
I was more effective.
One man, one small change: it can make a difference.

Just a theory, share if you agree, comment if you want to discuss